The idea for Hat Game came about when my then-girlfriend Erika and I were talking about ways to get to know each other. I suggested we could write down questions to answer and put them in a hat to draw at random. That got me thinking about what kind of getting-to-know-you games were out there for people who are seriously dating or engaged. I didn’t find much that fit, so I made Hat Game as a Christmas gift for Erika.
Getting to know someone can be fun, nerve-wracking or a mix of both. By sorting the Hat Game questions into three categories of seriousness, I thought we could warm up with easy (green) questions then progress to yellow and then red questions. This way each time playing would follow a natural conversational cadence but give us plenty of opportunity to go deep.
To make Hat Game, I pulled together about 150 questions—most were original, others were adapted from lists I found online.
We eventually worked through every question in the deck, covering a range of topics and getting to know each other on a deeper level. Plus, it was fun. I won’t credit Hat Game with us getting married, but it certainly didn’t hurt.